Hey Simon, if I understand you correctly, your issue is that the AF-ON button on your X-T5 only keeps focus when you hold down the "AF-On" button, correct? So, if you are focused on say, a bottle, and you depress the AF-ON button, it focuses, but then when you move away, and back on the bottle, it has gone out of focus? So what happens when you just press it once? Does it not focus?
It sounds like you "may" have the "Pre-AF" setting under "AF-MF" turned on. This will continually try to focus your X-T5 wherever you are pointing.
And by default, Back button focus is already turned on by fact that the "AF-ON" button is programmed for just that. You still have to decouple the AF off of the shutter, but back button focus is already enabled out of the box. So, if you have the "AF-On" button programmed to be, in fact, "AF-On", then you are using back button focus. And hence each time you press the button, it will focus on what you are intending. If you keep it depressed, it will continue to keep focus wherever you move the camera.
For a try, depress the disp/back button at bottom for a few seconds for the function menu to pop up and assign "AF-On" to another button on the back, and see if the behavior follows. If it does, then it isn't the AF-ON button. Hope that helps