You make a good point that there are so many features in new camera designs that we never had in the film world. One really needs to determine which of those features, if any, really hold value for the buyer.
I entered the Fujifilm world this past September, and I think my selection process served me well. I chose to intentionally ignore comparisons of cameras. Realizing that every camera body is designed for specific price points, purposes. and preferences, comparing them made no sense to me. Instead, I made a list of criteria important to me, and how I would use the camera. My background is also film, so I was looking for a minimal set of features. This happened to lead me to Fujifilm's lower cost options, and I chose the X-E3 over the X-T20 because I'm right-eye-dominant, and I was attracted to the rangefinder form-factor and button layout. I can honestly say that after four months, I have no desire for any other camera body. The X-E3 is perfectly adequate for me. In fact, I consider any other additional feature a negative. For example, I read many comments asking for the articulating screen; I don't want this on the X-E3; other models have this. I like the minimalist feature set and its ergonomic presentation.
The point is I am happy because I matched my needs and purposes to the camera. If you buy based on comparisons, I'm afraid that's running down a rabbit hole because not every camera has everything, such as performance level, video capability, pro features (weathersealing and dual card slots), and form factor.
I think the EVF only, such as the X-T30, is beyond adequate, and I think it's excellent. I know there are other viewfinders that others praise highly, but that info doesn't mean the EVF's only aren't excellent. I would think the X-T3 indeed has a sweeter viewfinder than the X-T30, but I don't think the X-T30 is at all a poor EVF. If it is anything like the X-E3 EVF, I would be quite happy with it.
Autofocus performance is difficult for me to comment on because I don't know what performance level you need, nor can I quantify the autofocus performance levels of the various models. Your comment about settings is highly valid. I can say the maze of settings affecting autofocus on my X-E3 dramatically affect the performance. But I will say that after tweaking settings based on some internet comments and other sources, my autofocus performance is beyond adequate. I can also say that XF lenses seem slightly faster to me than XC lenses, but the XC lenses are not problematically slow.
I guess I'm lucky that the items I selected objectively and systematically come in at the lower end of the price range. I literally consider all of my gear expendable because of this. I use common sense caution with my gear while out in the field, but I do not restrict my activities to protect it. I am an amateur, and I'm purely just having fun in my retirement. I do believe if I opted for higher end pro-model bodies and red badge lenses, I wouldn't be so courageous, and therefore not so creative with my photography.